Tuesday March 23, 2010

Things are always changing, always up, always down, always different. The only thing that remains the same.

I think it's time to start up with the positive, sappy missives again. Get stoked.

January 23 - 27, 2009

Think I'll float on down, to Richmond-town.

Haven't updated in awhile, my bad.

I have joys from the past couple of days that have warmed my heart, along with a flimsy promise to try to update more.

This weekend was remarkable for many reasons. When on a little trip to visit H for a few days, which was absolutely fanatic. I know there are many things that should stand out as great moments of joy and perfect but honestly it was a simple moment of clarity. I was building a bicycle wheel, while H made pasta and pesto. As simple as that. It was simple, soft and comfortable. It was a beautiful change from the pressures and stress of the holidays, as well as his visit in December. It was nice working together, smiling together, despite the pressures of time. And it was pretty awesome building my first bicycle wheel.

I'm moving soon, and frankly cannot wait to get back to the comfort of a neighborhood. Joy joy joy. Found and leased the house today.

New years promises; write, be joyful, smile, take chances, assert myself, stop procrastinating.

Friday December 5, 2008

Crazy past couple of weeks. Always running, always writing, always hanging, barely time to breathe, let alone write in a silly little journal. Desperately need to finish the comprehensive exams. Baby steps to the degree, only half left, half finished.

Tonight was a nice breath of fresh air. Went to the Art Walk with a friend, after attempted for 30 minutes to jump her car. Quite amusing. But what was the perfect moment tonight?

It's taken a bit of thinking to get to it. I feel like I've fallen out of practice looking for the moments, but it needs to happen, especially in the winter doldrums.

So today.

Monday October 20, 2008

Flew in early this morning from an absolutely perfect weekend in Boston. I am incapable of picking apart every perfect moment from that weekend as ever moment was perfection and joy.

Yet, Monday itself was an odd bit of beauty. J picked me up from the airport, 30 minutes late. Those 30 minutes were small potatoes compared to the 6 months that have passed since I last saw him. I promised myself I wouldn't cry, yet there I was in the airport "Arrivals" lane, a bunch of lilies clasped in my hand embracing my long lost friend with tears tumbling down my face. I felt silly, contrived and wonderful. As we embraced, for what seemed like hours (whole in reality was probably less than a minute), I felt the world spinning and the eyes of those waiting for their own rides fall upon us. What did they think? We were long lost siblings? Friends? Lovers? Does it matter? In that lasting embrace I re-found joy in a friendship which I have been so ready to shove aside as worthless, heart-breaking. I realized why I loved him for so long, why it was so hard to let go and finally why it is better than anything else to accept. Accept lasting friendship.

Saturday October 4, 2008

It's been awhile since I wrote, sorry. I am now attempting to take advantage of my night in (the first in who knows how long), to begin writing again. Although, I make no promises for how long this may last.

Saturday morning I awoke earlier than I would have liked. Head pounding from far too many Pabsts, and far too late of a night on Friday. Any other weekend I would have skipped my plans and curled back up underneath my quilts, but not this Saturday. I spent, what was most likely, the last beautiful weekend of summer/fall lost amidst the trees, trails and streams of Afton mountain. The sky was clear and the leaves a translucent pink which coloured the trails in an Alice and Wonderland haze. It was absolutely perfect, and wonderful, and freeing to be out of the city breathing clean mountain air. The company was not half bad either. Flying down the interstate singing Old Crow and various other country tunes, smiling, laughing with the T-top. Absolute joy. I do have my reservations, which are in every way valid, and I shall try my hardest not to become stuck in the perils i put behind me in my college days.

Wednesday Septemeber 3, 2008

Peaches in the summer time, apples in the fall.

Walking home tonight, the city damp, humid and hot around me. I could feel the walls of the city breathing around me. She felt like an old friend I had not seen in ages. There are some nights where I love this city more than I can put into words.

Sorry this is not a good update. I've been stuck in an odd place with my life right now, I'm struggling to see the good and alienating that which should be. I've been coming and going so much this last month I look forward to hunkering down with school this month. Although I cannot pretend that it does not feel abnormal to be here without J, and that it does not hurt the way he's began to treat me. To each it's season. Everything moves in cycles.

Friday August 15 - Sunday August 17, 2008

This weekend was best friends day, accompanied by a massive influx of out of town friends. Between burritos, beers, bikes, dance parties, short skirts, new friends, swimming, rope swings, laughs, smiles, hugs, more burritos, bands, music and everything else I cannot list here, this weekend was better than anything else. August has been over flowing with joy and love and laughter. Last weekend was a large camp out party, and this weekend is the wedding of a good friend. This month, and every month I hope the smiles never stop.